It’s been quite a while since I’ve written much. I’m not sure why but tonight seems to be a night for writing, so we’ll see what happens.
My daily schedule has been a little monotonous lately. Quite frankly, I find myself living for the weekends and as I sit and think about it, I know an awful lot of people who are right there along with me.
But...I read a quote today that struck me.
“This after all is the goal of the American Dream: To make much of ourselves. But here the Gospel and the American Dream are clearly and ultimately antithetical to each other. While the goal of the American Dream is to make much of us, the goal of the Gospel is to make much of God.”
I think the reason this quote struck me is because I can relate to this. I have found myself pursuing this so called 'American Dream’ during my weeks. I get up and work the day away, I check things off my ’to do list’ and I crawl into bed feeling exhausted and almost sorry for myself for having to work ’so hard’ (I sound like a total spoiled baby here).
But when I read this quote I have a major “Check your motives” moment. You see, I’m not saying that there is anything wrong with the American Dream, I’m just examining my motives for doing anything and everything that I’ve put on my to do list lately (which is quite long by the way). <--- you see, I’m kinda a spoiled brat.
Basically, tonight I’m sitting here just thinking of the reasons behind all of my ‘to dos’. The real question that gives insight to my motives is; Am I making much of myself or much of God through all these things?
Here is where I admit that I have fallen short. I have lacked the ambition and motivation that God is calling us toward. I have failed.
In all that I’m doing I’m not constantly making much of God. Sometimes I find I am stuck in this world where I am striving and constantly trying to keep up with the latest and greatest in order to reach some sort of finished and complete version of me and when I’m stuck in that world it is ALL ABOUT ME! Then I remember so clearly when I read a quote like the one above what this life is all about, it’s not about me at all. I’m a part of a story that is so big and so intricate that it’s impossible for everything to be about me.
The reality is, I will never be a complete and finished, perfect person. I will most likely always have a ’to do’ list. And so, when I look at my ‘to do’ list tomorrow I will continue to do my best in checking off tasks, but I can feel a renewed sense of purpose in those things, an excitement to accomplish what ever it is that makes much of God and less of what makes much of me.
